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About Varied / Hobbyist AmberFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 5 Years
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It is 2 am here and I have had alcohol so this update might spiral into nonsense.

 I'm finally working on the next chapter of my fic because I know if I don't then it won't happen.  I want to finish this, I need to finish this and then I can write whole fics and not post chapters until it's done and if I don't finish them then no one is disappointed because no one knew the ideas existed but me...Yet isn't that my greatest fear? That these great stories won't ever be shared? Or are they great? Am I stressing myself out to produce shit that people say enjoy to be nice because maybe one story was actually good? I mean how many times can I rehash "person becomes beast" before it gets old? Hairy Little Problem was good, Sang had potential, Altered was inventive but too serious, Lupine Lunacy was a mistake and hopefully I can save Cessation.... I just feel like I am spitting the same story back at you guys and ignoring the humor and wackiness that is TF2 because I am too lazy to create my own stuff.  Yet I'm also afraid my own stuff might not be good...Dear lord I am tired, good night.
I am so sorry about the lack of activity but then again I keep doing it so do my apologies even count anymore?
My stomach issues have gotten worse to the point I went to the ER for vomiting blood after it coming out the other end digested earlier that same week... I was sent to a specialist and tomorrow I go under to get scoped... I don't react well to anesthesia and my poor stomach only complicates matters but they have to look for the cause and evaluate the damage done.Hopefully it's nothing new medication can't fix and surgery is not needed.
That being said my mental health has been affected by the constant pain and chronic vomiting. I am seeing my therapist again... she is encouraging me to do art with what energy I have so I have been drawing and working on a hat. My writing muse eludes me though. It takes alot of energy to write and being I had such a scant outline for TF2: Cessation it is even harder...
Forgive me and thank you for your continued patience.


Graywolf120's Profile Picture
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Current Residence: None of your business
Favourite genre of music: Hard Rock
Favourite style of art: Too many to choose.
Favourite cartoon character: Goliath from Gargoyles
 A lot has happened recently, I'm still in school after a long scare that I might fail due to not getting some things done due to the deadline being moved up by two months. Thankfully that is done with ( I got the things done) and I passed four classes, the fifth still in session but going well. My creativeness is active and managing to score a Miss Monster diy pre-order mask has inspired a comic series/graphic novel idea between my sister ( illustrator)  and I (writer)  but it is in it's infancy. I am also working on a life sized griffin ( housecat sized) and other 3D projects.
However despite all this promise my health has been rapidly deteriorating, my GERDS has gone from non existent with a pill once a day to taking my meds twice a day and still having constant heartburn, new coughing, almost hourly vurping, occasional vomiting with blood on more than one occasion within four months. My  symptoms make me fear the worse while my doctor takes no action, she has been an issue in recent years but switching doctors is hard...
I don't want you guys to worry, I just want you to know that while I will try to keep creating (I really want to make sure everything is finished) I must keep in mind how much energy I have and what I need to do. Also I will make sure you are updated if anything major happens, so if I am silent for awhile I'm not...well I'm resting.
That being said, would you guys rather have more but shorter chapters or fewer but longer chapters?
  • Listening to: Battlecry- Imagine Dragons
  • Reading: Textbooks
  • Watching: Informative videos
  • Playing: Undertale
  • Eating: Bland Soup
  • Drinking: Water

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Gin93 Featured By Owner Aug 9, 2016
happy birthday....i hope you're alright
Graywolf120 Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the birthday wish. I think I am, just waiting on biopsy results of a small mass they found.
Gin93 Featured By Owner Aug 12, 2016
please be ok
Graywolf120 Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
I will.
Gin93 Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2016
hey have ypou caught up in my fic?
Graywolf120 Featured By Owner Jun 26, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Indeed, the day they came out.
Nuclear-Shadow Featured By Owner Mar 25, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave! ^-^
CelestinArt Featured By Owner Feb 29, 2016   General Artist
Thanks for the fav! :)
RozettaNameless Featured By Owner Jan 13, 2016  Professional Digital Artist
Thx for the FAV)
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